What a Difference a Year Makes….

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As we’re coming up to the end of 2013, I’m looking back over the year to see if I’ve accomplished everything I thought I would. I’ve hit the mark on some goals, missed on others. The big thing I’ve realized is that it’s one more trip around the sun….and I need to make the best use of those opportunities.

This time last year, I was not in the best shape (that’s putting it mildly). I weighed too much, I was too stressed out, and kept putting off making a positive change. I finally got to a point where it was more painful to stay where I was, than it was to start moving in a direction that I wanted to go. So, I set some goals, shared them with a few trusted friends, and started working on them. I kept it pretty quiet at first, but as other people started noticing my changes, I felt better about sharing them.

After putting it off for way too long, I got serious about eating right and taking better care of me. Over a period of about 9 months, I lost 80 lbs, getting back to my high school weight. I would joke with people that I was trying to get down to my original weight…..7 lbs, 7 ounces. It took a lot of work…but mainly it took focus. Exercise was important, but eating was more important. I needed to eat less, but also to eat better. Some days I needed to make sure that I ate enough.

Exercise was a big part of it, too….but I needed to follow Covert Bailey’s advice – “Start so slowly people make fun of you.” The first day I went jogging (not running), I jogged 60 feet…then I’d walk 60. Each week, I’d add a bit more jogging…..and eventually, was able to start (slowly) running. I progressed to running my first 5K, then a 10K….then a 10 miler…..and eventually a 1/2 Marathon.

To keep from getting injured, I alternated running with biking, and built up my distance gradually, going from 5 miles in the early spring, to riding two full century rides (100 miles) in the fall. During the course of the year, I found a few truisms:The old saying about it all being about “Eat Less, Exercise More” is true….but emphasis needs to be on the “Eat Less” part. I found that I could out-eat any exercise program. For me, losing the weight came down to one simple rule. “It’s what you eat.” If anyone asked me about other rules, I just repeated rule #1. It’s that simple. Not easy…but simple.

I also realized that the process I followed could be applied to almost any goal – so here are three principles that worked for me:

1) Write your goals down – That’s goal setting 101, and I’ve known it for years…..I knew it so well, that I didn’t think I had to write mine down…..and subsquently didn’t make any progress. In fact, if I didn’t write them down, I couldn’t fail. THAT was the big realization – in order to move forward, I had to risk failing. So, I wrote my goals down, and made sure that I reviewed them daily to keep them in focus.

2) Share them wisely – In 2014, I’m going to be more public about my goals, because I’ve found a greater level of confidence that I can achieve them. In 2012, I needed more support, so I kept my circle pretty small. Find people that you know will be supportive of your goal. Too many times, other people can be negative or not supportive. It’s not always intentional, but when you’re striking out on a new path, you need the right team behind you. Find good people that are on your side.

3) Track your progress – I found that one of the biggest keys to moving forward was knowing where I was in relation to where I wanted to be. Accountability was important – not just with others….but mainly to myself. At the end of the day, if I didn’t care enough to be accountable to myself, neither would anyone else. Here’s living proof: These pics were taken 1 year apart, at the Seagull Century – I don’t know who that guy is in the left picture….but the bike looks a lot less likely to break in two on the right:

So, how has your year been? Have you achieved what you set out to do? What have you learned? Good news is…2014 is right around the corner, and now is the ideal time to take action towards your goals. Make a difference in the way you do things, and you’ll make a difference in yourself.

Shameless plug time: On February 5th, 2014, I’ll be supporting the Multiple Myeloma Research Foundation (MMRF) in the 2014 Empire State Building Run-Up. 1576 steps, 86 flights, and over 1,000 feet straight up. If you can make a donation, large or small, I would be most grateful.

Nowhere to Go but Up…

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On LinkedIn, I participate in a group called Executive Athletes. I certainly aspire to be both….but I frequently find myself wondering if I’m deserving of either term, let alone both. I can certainly agree with their mission statement – “To inspire people to be the best that they can be and to push beyond any perceived limits they may believe that they have in order to be successful in life, business and sport” I want to inspire others to be their best….and to push beyond my own perceived limits. In the past few years, I’ve certainly pushed beyond a number of limits, from recovering from a severe spinal injury…to losing over 80 pounds….to becoming a much better athlete as a middle-aged dad than I ever was when I was younger.

In a discussion the other day, EA founder Ken Lubin posed the question -

“What event is on your bucket list?”

Since he had mentioned he was doing the Empire State Building Run-Up, I said that it sounded like fun. It’s ONLY 1,050 feet. Straight up. 1576 steps, and 86 flights of stairs. Only 700 runners get in each year, and fewer than 7,000 runners have completed the climb in the event’s 36 year history. Sure. Sounds like fun. Since it’s a ‘bucket list’ item, it’s really just a novel idea, something that I don’t have to follow through……..or so I thought.

Less than a day later, I got an e-mail from Alicia O’Neill, Director of Endurance Events for the Multiple Myeloma Research Foundation (MMRF). I was already familiar with the MMRF, because of my high school buddy, David Goad. David had been inspiring lots of people through his impressive endurance efforts…and his amazing ability to rally people around a worthy cause. In this case, David had skated to the top of a mountain, in a red cape and Spongebob Squarepants boxers, to challenge people to raise funds for the MMRF. David also has a personal connection to the cause – his brother, Jeff Goad (who sat next to me in the high school trombone section), is a Multiple Myeloma survivor – and through treatment and incredible effort, has also achieved some amazing feats, completing both the Chicago and NYC Marathons in support of the MMRF.

But back to Alicia’s e-mail. She challenged me to sign up for the Empire State Building Run-Up in 2014. Now, I’ve tried some crazy things in my day – but up until that point, I never REALLY thought seriously about being able to do it – it’s a ‘someday’, ‘bucket list’ item. Well, bucket list items don’t happen…..unless you go out and go after them. So, I decided that I would give it a go. So…while I had donated to David’s MMRF event campaigns in the past….now I had to put my OWN name on the line. With only about 2 months to raise funds AND train for the event, I had to think a lot bigger than I’m used to thinking.

BUT…..nothing happens without taking that first step…even if it’s the first of over 1500 of them. So….I’m going for it. On February 5, 2014, I’ll be joining the MMRF in the Empire State Building Run-Up. I’ve got a LOT of stair climbing to do to get ready……and I’m going to need YOUR help.

How can you help? You can help in two ways:

1) By making a donation to the MMRF through my ESB Run-up page

2) By sharing this story through e-mail and social media

I am very appreciative of any donations, but even more thankful to share Jeff’s story, and how he and David have inspired me to step outside my own perceived limits. While I have not suffered from Multiple Myeloma, I know what it’s like to have my world turned upside down by a physical challenge. Nearly 10 years ago, I was in a motorcycle accident that resulted in an ‘explosive fracture’ of my L2 vertebrae. My right leg was initially paralyzed, and the doctor said before surgery that it was unclear whether I would ever walk again. It took me a full year to recover, but I’ve gone from being in a wheelchair to completing 10 full century bike rides, a number of 5K races and a 1/2 marathon. In 2014, I’ve committed to doing the Marine Corps Marathon, and now, I’m going to climb to the top of the Empire State Building. Join me in the climb by making a donation to MMRF.

Perfectly Good Airplane.

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There’s an old saying about skydiving that only a fool would jump out of a “perfectly good airplane.” Well, count me as a fool, because I let a bunch of friends convince me that skydiving would be an awesome adventure.

We all piled into our cars and drove out to the local grass-strip airport with a peeling “Learn to Skydive!” sign on the barbed wire fence. It was a beautiful summer day, the sun was shining in the summer sky, with the clouds drifting lazily across the horizon.

Only a fool would jump out of a perfectly good airplane.

I could see for miles, smell the fresh cut grass and summer onions, hear the sound of a tractor in the distance….and feel my knees knocking and teeth chattering.

I have to confess – I have a fear of heights. Not really a fear of heights themselves – I’m fine in a commercial airliner, or in a tall building….I just happen to have a fear of long rapid descents followed by sudden deceleration.We had seen the videos of skydivers floating gently in the air, and heard people talk about how great it was….and we were going to do it ourselves. I didn’t tell anyone that I was a bit nervous. When we went zip-lining in Costa Rica, my nickname was “El Pollo Grande.”

Throughout the day, we did a lot of training – we watched videos, worked on climbing in and out of a mock-up plane, and jumped off a short tower – We were supposed to drop and roll…but my efforts were more like drop…..and thud. Not exactly a confidence-building exercise.

Throughout the day, we watched other groups go up and take their turn. While we were talkative earlier, everyone got more serious as our time approached. Finally….it was our turn. Three of us climbed into the back of a Cessna 182 with a pilot seat…..and not much else. It didn’t even have a door. We shoe-horned ourselves in a semi-fetal position, with one hand over our static line – because if it got pulled….our chute would open INSIDE the plane. We taxied down the runway, and lifted off, and slowly soared skyward….taking large circles, like a hawk riding a thermal.

You’d think we were excited, right? It was so quiet inside the plane, you could have heard a pin drop. We were all focused on the big open doorway on the side of the plane. There was only one way down…and that was it.

As we got higher, the only one talking was our jump master. He clearly had too much coffee, because he wouldn’t stop talking about how GREAT this was going to be. The more he talked…the more we kept…Getting quiet …..Getting nervous…and wanting to Get out of There.

Once we reached our jump height, the jump master would ask each person….Are you ready to skydive? We all had to answer YES! Because if we didn’t, it would be a long ride back to the ground….then the walk of shame back to the car. None of us were brave enough to admit we were scared.

Now it was my turn. The jump master said, “Are you ready to skydive?” I said, “Yes?” (while trying to sound convincing). I followed his instructions to “Put your feet out and stop.” No problem there. I grabbed the strut and put my feet out on the step.

“Turn and step out.” No matter how mentally ready you are, it’s still a shock when you get your body out of the plane. This is not a natural motion. Your body has some sense of self-preservation, even if you don’t. As soon as you clear the door, it’s like standing up in a convertible going 100 MPH.

“Go all the way out and hang”

At that point, you have to be committed. If you’re not, you SHOULD be committed. You start inching your hands out the strut of the plane, towards to red hand prints painted on the strut.

At least I think it was paint.

As you get closer to the hands, you realize that you can no longer keep your feet on the strut….no matter how much you want to. At that point….you have to hang on like a pair of pants flapping on a clothesline.

When you get to the end, the jump master says “Look up!” ,and you do….then you yell “DOT!” (because there’s a dot on the underside of the wing). then….you, ALL OF A SUDDEN….

Let go.

Now, when you see it in a video, it looks like you fall slowly and gracefully.. You don’t. If you’ve studied physics, you know that a feather and a rock fall at the same rate – a skydiver falls faster. At least that’s what it feels like. I wanted to scream so badly, but all I could do was grit my teeth and gasp as I fell like a REALLY FAST rock. You’re supposed to count One Thousand One, One Thousand Two….Five while your chute opens but it’s more like (run other way) 12345LOOKUP!

At that point,…..my chute magically opened….and I began to float slowly down, gracefully turning right…..then left……then right….then left.. Getting closer, am I on track? Drifting too close to that cow pasture….bring it back in….

As you approach the ground, you can hear the observer talking you in, counting you down to where you pull both toggles down to stall the chute, and run it in.

He kept saying, “You’re doing great!” “Looking Good!” …I think it was a recording.

I must have waited a bit too long, because when I stalled the chute, I STALLED THE CHUTE….and did a dramatic re-creation of that ski jumper on Wide World of Sports….The Agony of Defeat, indeed.

I rolled…and rolled…and rolled…and eventually came to a stop. I couldn’t hear anything. I wondered if I was dead…..as I began to hear muffled sounds coming closer, I realized that I was so tangled in the chute, it was drowning out the noise.

When I finally stopped rolling, and got my wits about me, I realized – I wasn’t dead! I was ALIVE! I was REALLY ALIVE!

…and that’s the whole point – it’s easy to be afraid BEFORE you jump. It’s perfectly natural to fear the unknown. It’s safe inside the plane, and it’s safer to ride back down to the ground…..but that’s not where the fun is. All the excitement and adventure happens AFTER you go out the door. It’s safer to not ask for that promotion…..to not get on stage and speak…But you’ll never get to experience that adventure, or have that fun…or make that change until you jump.

THAT’S why you jump. The fear is there, but it’s only temporary. Once you jump, you can never see the world in the same way. Ever again.

(Anti-)Social Media

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This week, I took a course centering around Social Media and the risks SM poses to an organization’s security posture. It’s been very interesting to see how SM has changed the way we communicate, from building new connections, sharing content and reporting the news.

Events around the world have utilized Social Media, and even been shaped by it. Some have said that the future may not be televised, but it will be blogged, tweeted, and shared on Facebook. Celebrities, Congressmen and companies have become both famous and infamous using SM. There are lots of reasons to make good use of social media, and tons of examples of how NOT to use it.

The course I took, Social Media Security Professional Certification (SMSP) , examines social networking channels and the risks they may pose to the security posture of an organization. It covers use of social media, skills and tools necessary to anticipate attacks and guard sensitive information, and how to quickly respond in the event of a social-media related security incident. While it was geared towards corporate / organization use, there were useful lessons for anyone who uses social media.

Have a policy.

Whether you have one or not, your users and customers are using social media….and you don’t want your employees speaking for you in ways that reflect poorly on your company. The lack of having a social media policy can also increase the risk for workplace bullying and harrassment. Develop clear rules and guidelines on how to use social media within your company, and also how it reflects on your company even outside of work. Make sure that employees are aware of the policies, and conduct refresher training regularly.

Listen first, then talk.

The half-life of an Internet ‘story’ can be very short, but if you make a mistake, it can live for a long time in the Web’s collective memory. It may be tempting to get your two cents in, but engaging in a Twitter war isn’t likely to make you look good, even you are 100% in the right. Very few will remember what you did right….but EVERYBODY will remember what you did wrong. Take the time to evaluate the situation, develop a reasoned response, THEN get your best message out there.

Respond, Don’t React.

When dealing with a social media issue (a bad review, customer service problem, etc), get in front of it quickly, so that it doesn’t escalate. JP Morgan learned the hard way. After asking for Twitter input for a Q&A with chairman Jimmy Lee, the overwhelming wave of negative Tweets caused them to quickly cancel the session. While it may be tempting to quickly fire back a clever tweet to catch part of the buzz around a trending topic, there are plenty of examples that don’t look nearly as clever after the fact. Take the time to evaluate your response BEFORE it can’t be recalled.

There’s no doubt that social media is a big part of our IT landscape, and we have to learn how to use it well. While it takes years to build a reputation, social media makes it possible to communicate instantly….and not always with positive results. Getting the right message out there is more important than just getting in front.

Cutting the Cord….

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For those of us who’ve been around long enough, there used to be one phone company. You paid a monthly fee to rent a phone, and Ma Bell took care of everything. It was clunky, expensive and inflexible, but man, it worked. Where do you think the term dial-tone reliability came from?

How much do you like your phone company?

Since then, from Bell breakup in the early ’80s, to the advent of cell phones, to the introduction of VOIP, to the explosion of smart phone and digital services, it’s a whole new world out there. A lot of people have cut the cord completely and gone to just using a smart phone for everything, but there’s still a demand for home-based phone services. It’s just changing rapidly and evolving every day.

Having two home offices in the house, I got tired of paying full freight for two lines, voice mail and all the other fees, so I’ve been experimenting to find the right mix for a long time. I found the best local deal, shopped LD providers, and reviewed my bills to make sure we had the right package. Still, I thought was paying too much for what I got.

When Vonage hit the market, I thought it was the best thing since sliced bread. I already had good cable Internet service, why not put that bandwidth to use? It was good for a while, and certainly a lot less expensive than my POTS (Plain Old Telephone Service) provider…..but between the poor carrier quality, low reliability and amazingly poor customer service, I dropped Vonage after about 5 months. Granted, they have improved – while a search of the term “Vonage bad customer service” returns 106,000 hits, the first ones are fairly dated at this point. At the time (around 2006-2007), the frustration was amazing.

Another player in the market has been MagicJack, and if you can get past the infomercial hype and blather, it’s not a bad little tool. Customer service is spotty at best, but for the price, I’m willing to put up with a lower level of service and reliability. For a 2nd line or desk-bound call use, it’s not bad. For $20 a year, it’s worth the price of admission. Would I pay more? Probably not. It requires a certain level of tolerance to get that cheap.

Skype has even become an alternative for those willing to use their computer as their phone. If I’m working from a desk, I like to wear a headset, so it’s a possibility, but it has its limitations, because there’s no forwarding or voice mail.

My local cable provider got into the voice market, and for a long time, I bundled my phone service with my cable and Internet provider. Initially cheaper than the local phone company, and mostly reliable, it became less of a good deal over time. Now, it’s about the same price as other local services or other full-service digital providers.

I’ve been a huge fan of Google Voice (GV) since its launch in 2009. I was lucky enough to snag an invitation, and continued to rave about its features as it moved to a much broader audience in 2010. What’s not to like? One single number with call routing, unlimited free calling in US and Canada, screening, voice mail, and a host of other features. If you have multiple phones between work, home, and cell, it’s an awesome tool.

One of my favorite features has been voice to text – where GV will translate a voice message to text and e-mail the results. Not only does it let you know that there’s a message, you can review it without having to get into voice mail. Most of the time, it worked well. Occasionally, the results came off as more entertaining than informative, but it’s frequently a useful tool, and that’s enough to make me a fan.

It’s not perfect, though – Google is abandoning the XMPP protocol in May, 2014, so fans of the OBIHai device will have to either migrate to another provider, or own a brick. Google is big enough that they can do that….(Google Reader, anyone?) They also killed off support for the Blackberry version of Google Voice, and took a long time to get a GV app on the AppStore…but for free, it’s still pretty good.

There are a number of VOIP providers that have recently sprung up, and a variety of devices that you can use, from StraightTalk, Vonage, Cisco, Ooma and Obi. The upside? You get lots of features, (more every day), and CHEAP phone service. The down side? It ain’t Ma Bell. While home VOIP service has become very reliable, if you can’t deal with less than perfect reliability, it might not be for you. Between the improvements in service and the amazing array of features available, for me, it’s a good deal. I no longer have a traditional land line, yet I use my home office all the time, despite its immunity to cell phone signals. I just route my cell calls to my GV number, using my OBIHai ATA adapter (for the next six months), then I’ll figure out something else. Again, it’s not perfect. Sometimes, it’s incredibly annoying. Overall, the balance of features and improvements in reliability have made it worth the effort.

Who ‘ya gonna call?

Crowd Computing…

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It’s incredible to see how Amazon Web Services (AWS) has grown from just a way to use excess storage capacity to the dominant player in cloud computing. Sure, there are other providers out there, and to be clear, some very capable providers in the market, including Rackspace, Google and Microsoft, but with over $3 billion in annual revenue, AWS is five times the size of its next 14 rivals. That’s incredible market power, When you get that big, you can go from being a market leader to a target – but it’s hard to see where Amazon has made any missteps along the way.

Back in 2000, I helped my company migrate their internal e-mail system to a hosted Exchange infrastructure. It was a controversial move at the time, at least within the company. I’d have people remind me frequently – “You know, your job depends on this being successful.” Doesn’t every project work that way? In any case, it was a good move for the company, and got them out of the mindset that you HAD to have on-site infrastructure to deliver a service. Today, there are a large number of cloud solutions for e-mail, including Microsoft Exchange. It’s gone from being controversial to (almost) being the norm. AWS is making such headway into corporate IT, it’s moving in that same direction.

In previous IT roles, I’ve had to work through a number of office moves, facility upgrades and relocations….and every time, the IT infrastructure was a big piece of the move budget. As externally hosted services became more viable, I would joke that if I were building an office for a new company, I’d just have an Internet connection, router and a phone switch. Well, the maturation of VOIP eliminated the need for a full blown phone switch. The rise of cloud computing is eliminating the need for on-site infrastructure, and AWS is not only growing at a phenomenal rate, the more traditional infrastructure vendors are getting in the game as well.

The question for IT leaders is, should YOU move your infrastructure to the cloud? While cloud computing deals with a number of issues, and provides a number of advantages like short deployment times, scalability and high reliability, it doesn’t deal with the most important reason to choose cloud as a solution – because it meets your requirements. Once you’ve determined your technology and IT requirements, then you can evaluate cloud, co-located, hybrid and locally hosted options for deployment and determine what’s the best platform for hosting your systems. If you decide to launch or migrate your systems in the cloud, it’s a great platform with a lot of advantages…..but do it because it meets your IT needs, not just because it’s the latest fad. You still need to think about availability, service and security…..so if you’re considering cloud, do so with an open mind.

On Your Mark, Get Set……

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Earlier this year, I set a goal to run a 1/2 marathon. Not a bad goal to choose, and certainly more ambitious than the average American couch-surfer. There are lots of people who have run longer races, and have more impressive results, but I’m happy with this goal. This weekend, I’ll be running in the Indianapolis Monumental 1/2 Marathon, along with my sister, brother-in law, and nephew, along with about 15,000 other runners.

On your marks, get set…..

Training for this race has been a long-term project. At 25, I could go out and run all day, and recover fairly quickly. Now that I’m no longer 25, it takes longer to build up my endurance, takes longer to recover, and injuries that might take me out for a day or two, now, might put me out of commission for weeks, or even scrub the race entirely. So, I’ve had to get a lot smarter about training. What have I learned?

First, I can still set ambitious physical goals. While I haven’t won any age group awards, and in some races, am just happy to be IN my age group. On top of that, there are many people out there who have much more challenging issues than my own inertia. They inspire me to dig a bit deeper, push a bit harder, and stretch a bit more to set goals at the next level.

Second, If I train smart, I can go after multiple goals at once. This year, I’ve competed in 6 5K races, two 5 milers, a 10K, a 10 miler, along with my upcoming 1/2 marathon. In addition to that, I’ve ridden in two century (100 mile) bike rides. I’ve done that by alternating my training schedule so that I’m never doing the same thing 2 days in a row. Cross-training has allowed me to train for several months straight with very little down time. When I’ve needed to take a break, or noticed something flaring up, just backing off a bit has given me the recovery I needed to get back on the horse.

Finally, while the physical goals have been fun to accomplish, the emotional and psychological rewards have been even more enjoyable. Working out and competing gives me a fun and exciting outlet. I get to meet some very interesting people, and it really helps deal with stress. If I’m frazzled from a long work day, or have a stressful day in front of me, getting on the treadmill or hitting the bike takes that edge off, and I’m a lot more alert and ready to deal with what’s in front of me.

After this race, I get to take a little break and ease off the training schedule a bit as we near the holidays….but I’m already setting my sights on next year’s goals. What will I be doing? I’ve already signed up for a very challenging century ride, will compete in a rowing competition, and am considering if I want to run a full marathon in the fall. I have some friends urging me to try a triathlon……so I’ll see if that is enough to get me in the pool to add that as a goal. I can swim, but it’s not pretty….so I’d have to get some coaching. What I’ve learned, however, is that I don’t have to be perfect to set the goal – I just have to get started. On your mark, get set….and GO!

Fear Factor

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I am a person who is, shall we say, not comfortable with vertical distances. In short, I have a fear of heights. While I’ve made it more manageable over time, I still prefer staying far from the edge, as opposed to leaning over the railing. Some things don’t bother me at all. Planes are fine, tall buildings are a breeze, roller coasters are a blast – because I feel safe and secure in all of them, even if they’re a little on the ‘exciting’ side.

Fear is a sign you need to pay attention.

When I’m a little more exposed, or there’s the potential of danger, I get a little more cautious. Sometimes, that’s perfectly OK. I wouldn’t climb up on my roof without a secured ladder, and I wouldn’t get close to the edge of a cliff without making sure my footing is secure. Other times, it might keep me from enjoying the experience.

And that’s the whole point – fear is a sign that you need to pay attention. There is a POTENTIAL danger out there, but many times that potential only exists only in our mind. Roller coasters can be scary, but they have safety systems in place to keep you secure, and accidents are quite rare. As long as you obey the safety signs and railings, you can safely go right up to the edge of the Grand Canyon without any danger.

It only becomes a problem when there’s safety (or low risk) but the PERCEPTION of danger. As I said before, I have a fear of heights….but I’ve learned to work around it. I’ve been on pretty much every major roller coaster in the US, been to the top of the Empire State Building, the former World Trade Center, and even gone skydiving. Was I afraid? You bet I was. I used that fear to get myself physically ready to move forward, instead of letting the fear keep me stuck where I was (and not enjoying a new experience).

It doesn’t have to be a physical danger to generate fear – many people are afraid to get up in front of an audience and speak. It’s been said that fear of public speaking is the #1 fear to most people. Jerry Seinfeld said that people are so afraid of public speaking, that they’d rather be the guy IN the casket, than the one giving the eulogy.

So, how do you get around it? How do you deal with fear to keep it from preventing your growth and enjoyment of new experiences? There are lot of ways, from building skills in small steps to elaborate desensitization routines….but I’ve found that the single most effective strategy for dealing with fear is action. ANY action. It doesn’t even have to be directly related to doing the activity. As long as you can get in motion, preferably doing something physical, you can get ahead of your brain’s tendency to over-process negative thoughts.

When I’m getting ready to speak, I’ll be moving around backstage, or focusing on my breathing, if I’m out in the open. When my name is called, I’ll immediately stand up and start moving towards the stage…..because it’s all about inertia – once an object is in motion…it tends to stay in motion. If you can overcome that initial friction that’s holding you in place, the rest is easy.

That’s how I deal with fear – What are some of the strategies that YOU have found effective?

Easy as Riding a Bike.

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I have to give a shout out to my son, Jamie – yesterday, he and I finished our fourth Seagull Century - a 100 mile bike ride out on the Eastern Shore of Maryland. If you’re ever going to attempt one of these rides, it’s the one to do. It’s almost completely flat, great scenery, and very well supported. They have a metric (100 kilometers, 62 miles) version, and they also have great SAG support to give you a lift home if either your bike or you break down en route.

Jamie’s first Century ride

The reason I want to give Jamie some extra kudos is that not only is it his fourth time doing the ride…..when he was younger, doctors were telling me that he may never ride a bike, that he just didn’t have the balance and coordination required. He wasn’t developing on the same timeline as other kids, and his motor skills just weren’t coming along.

As a parent, I was devastated. All parents have hopes and dreams for their children, and I didn’t know what the future would bring. I don’t, however, believe in the ‘no-win’ scenario. I was determined that if it was achievable, he would learn to swim, run, ride a bike – and be as ‘normal’ as possible. Jamie proved quickly that he was never ‘normal’. He was exceptional. Sure, it took longer to learn some things – it took me two complete summers to teach him to ride. I researched how riders learn, what things get in the way, and how to build his skills so that he internalized the previous ones. (BTW – if you’re teaching your kid to ride a bike, take off the training wheels. They teach you to lean AWAY from that feeling of falling, when riding requires using it to fall forward).

I found a tool called a ‘ReadyRider’ - there are a number of tools out there, called Balance Buddy, or something similar. It allowed me to walk behind Jamie, where he couldn’t see me ‘helping’ him, so he could focus on balancing the bike. I took the pedals off, and first, we focused on just rolling the bike forward. His feet could still touch the ground, so he felt safe. Over time, I’d provide less balance ‘help’, raise the seat, add pedals, and make it more challenging. Again, it took two full summers, but by that time, he could really ride. We started going out on neighborhood rides, then longer ones, and he eventually got his Scout Cycling merit badge – which required several 10 mile rides, a 15 miler, a 25 miler, and the final one was a 50-mile ride. On the 50-miler, he crashed less than a mile after the start when his wheel went off the trail….but despite a big knee scrape, he went forward and finished the ride.

Assateague Island

When he was 14, I thought he’d be ready to attempt something even bigger, so we started training for the Seagull Century. We took our time, took breaks, and despite being very tired at the end (me more than him), he completed the ride. We did another one two years later…..and at the 25 mile mark, Jamie dropped me like a bad habit. I finally caught up with him at the 80-mile rest stop, but that was because we picked up a 25MPH head wind that made pedaling a slog to the end. Still, he finished. We chose the shorter route last year (62 miles), mainly because I hadn’t trained enough…but this year, we decided to do the full 100.

2012 Seagull finish line

With ideal weather at the start, we made great time. Jamie got a couple of cramps on the ride, but a quick hop off the bike and some kneading got him going again. Temps got pretty hot in the afternoon, but we pushed the last 15 miles and finished in our fastest time ever. I’m very proud of him, and whatever he decides to do in life, he’s going to have the determination to push through barriers and just keep moving forward to do it. He’s shown that time and again. Not only has he done 4 century rides, it’s all the training that led up to being able to accomplish it. He’s also a straight-A student, and achieved the rank of Eagle Scout earlier this year. I’m not one to brag, but in Jamie’s case, I’m going to make an exception.

So, what about you? Do you ever encounter times when you’ve been told you can’t do

4th Seagull Century complete!

something, that you just don’t have the skills, education, or drive to get it done? It happens to all of us – the important thing is to determine what information is useful, and what information you need to tune out and ignore. You CAN do a lot more than you think is possible….and certainly a lot more than others think is possible. You’re the one who can make it happen. Take a lesson from Jamie, and just keep moving forward.

Meet Market.

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What was your name again?

I got to spend all of one day this week at a recruiting fair for a new project that’s just getting started. Like some job fairs, it may only be a meet-and-greet, but what may not hit home with some candidates, is that it is STILL an interview. I’m not a big fan of making interviews stressful – there’s enough of that that already happens….but I DO want to know enough about the candidate to be able to get a reasonable impression of who they are, what they think their strong points are, and any ideas that they might have about how to improve their environment.

Some candidates understand what its all about, come dressed well, prepared, and ready to answer questions, and have a few of their own. Others, well, not so much. I’ve had some interviews that were interesting and even fun – and others that seemed to drag on for the entire time. Here are a few pointers to help make it easier on both the candidate and the interviewer.

1) Even if it’s a job fair, remember, it’s still an interview – and since there are so many people going through the process, all we’ll have is what we had a chance to write down during the 30 minutes, and any lasting impressions (good or bad). Make sure they’re good ones.

2) Remember in a job fair that the interviewers are seeing LOTS of people all day long. They’re looking for ways to quickly determine if the person should move forward in the process. When I’m given a stack of resumes, my first pass is to reduce the pool to those I need to talk with….and I’m amazed that resumes still come through with typos and poor grammar. I’m not looking for perfect….but at least have SOMEONE review your resume before you hand it out. If you’re good, I want to talk to you – but if you can’t take the time to make sure this document is good, how can I know that you’re not just as sloppy on the job?

3) Get the basics right – Show up on time, dressed reasonably, and ready to go. You don’t have to over dress for the interview, but better to make that mistake than do the opposite. I had a candidate show up late, unshaven, in a sweatshirt and jeans….and getting any information was difficult at best. The next person came in suit and tie, fully prepared, and even had a portfolio of his achievements and certifications – I wanted to tell them – “You had me at hello.”

Job-hunting is a stressful exercise – it’s not easy for anyone, but you can make it easier by doing a few simple things – prepare, stand out, and get the basics right. It doesn’t guarantee you’ll get the job, but you’ll stand a lot better chance by standing out (in a good way).